Deadspin

Today In SportsCenter Fashion: Doug Gottlieb's Mentos Commercial Couture [Fashion]

David Matthews — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:20:36 EST

In which we examine the occasionally controversial wardrobe choices on everyone's favorite morning serial. In this installment, Doug Gottlieb. More »

C. Ronaldo’s Latest Attempt And 9 Great Football Adverts! [Advert]

The Spoiler — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:05:00 EST

Listening to the various ad execs taking him through their latest idea must have caused something of a tightening in the Cristiano Ronaldo trousers. More »

AN ESPN VP Joins The Olbermann-Simmons Pillow Fight [Media Meltdowns]

Tommy Craggs — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:35:27 EST

ESPN Executive VP and Editor John Walsh snarks back at Keith Olbermann in today's SportsBusiness Daily, and suddenly the Olbermann-Simmons feud has become one of those great Greek tragedies full of incest and bloodshed and men with stately white beards. More »

Pacquiao V. Mayweather: "The Greatest Fight Never Fought" [Boxing]

GQ — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:50:18 EST

GQ has a wonderful story about Manny Pacquiao written by Andrew Corsello in April's issue. Here's the sidebar, written by Daniel Riley, they gave us permission to republish, which is not online yet. More »

Conviction In Darrent Williams Murder Trial [Nfl]

David Matthews — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:10:20 EST

A Denver jury has found Willie D. Clark guilty in the 2007 murder of Denver Broncos cornerback Darrent Williams. His sentencing is scheduled for April 10. [Denver Post, Westword] More »

Ari Fleischer Tapped By Tiger Woods To Do Job He's Not Very Good At [Tiger Woods]

DEADSPIN I-TEAM — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 14:50:33 EST

So Tiger has reportedly hired the former Bush spokesman to repair his image and help plot his return to golf, which could come March 25 at the Arnold Palmer Invitational. This isn't about the quality of Fleischer's work, we're told. More »

Near-Death Experiences, Deodorant, And Eggert’s Shymen [Funbag]

Drew Magary — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 14:20:06 EST

Time for your Thursday edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Find more of Drew's stuff at KSK or on Twitter. Today, we're covering candles, immigrants, bukkake, silencers, boners, blacking out, and more. More »

Inflatable Dong-Tongued Mascot Returns To Eat ESPN's Michelle Beadle [Michelle Beadle]

David Matthews — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 12:50:00 EST

Mackerel Jordan, last seen devouring hapless university athletic department employees, appeared on SportsNation yesterday. After being mocked by Michelle Beadle, the man-fish did what man-fish do best: feast. More »

Texas Rangers: Reminding Them Of Steak [2010MLBPreviews]

Will Leitch — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 11:30:50 EST

Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: Texas Rangers. More »

Dispatch: "I Jacked It On Camera For Money" [Dispatches]

Anonymous — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 10:45:48 EST

Two days ago, Drew Magary wondered out loud if any of our readers would really do porn if offered. Well, one anonymous reader has. Here is his story. More »

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: The 49ers Like "Winners" [NFL Draft]

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 10:30:06 EST

As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: 49ers coach Mike Singletary seeks a younger version of Mike Singletary. More »

Last Night's Winner: People Who Enjoy Watching Yankee Stadium Blow Up [Last Night's Winner]

Tommy Craggs — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 09:50:01 EST

In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the folks who get a perverse thrill from watching that pompous old Bronx ornament get gutted and torn apart, piece by self-important piece. More »

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor [Mlb]

Tommy Craggs — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 09:00:12 EST

Ladies and germs, I give you Jerry Thornton of WEEI. More »

Ron Darling Not High On Mets This Year And Has Attractive Wife, Says My Dad [Springtrainingreportsfrommyfather]

DAULERIO — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 08:30:11 EST

Subject: "scoop": aj,talked to ron darling in the hot tub.asked him if the mets could catch the phillies".no way the phillies are too strong".his wife is a knockout her name is joanna last.could be wip material.dad More »

Beadle Distressed By Inflatable Dong Tongue; Cowherd, Not So Much [Wake Up Deadspin]

Barry Petchesky — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 06:30:00 EST

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day. More »

Finally, A Basebrawl With Two Separate Felony Assaults [Baseball]

Barry Petchesky — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 02:30:00 EST

How often does SportsCenter tease a bench-clearing brawl, only to disappoint you when it turns out the hitter doesn't chase the pitcher into the outfield with his bat? Here's one that lives up to the promise inherent in every beanball. More »

Boston Fans To Pay For Right To Buy Drinks [Mlb]

Barry Petchesky — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 01:00:00 EST

Ah, the good old days when the creeping menace of seat licenses were only confined to actual sporting events. Not anymore, thanks to Jerry Remy's new sports bar, and its $500 season passes. More »

Florida State Has Asterisks Everywhere [College Football]

Barry Petchesky — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 23:30:00 EST

FSU's Sod Cemetery contains grass from the sites of important road wins; some of which, according to the NCAA, are no longer wins. One fan of jurisprudence (and the Gators) took it upon himself to update the headstones. [EDSBS] More »

How To Destroy Baseball In One Easy Step [Mlb]

Barry Petchesky — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 22:00:00 EST

A special committee has been looking into way to solve baseball's parity problems, and one of the proposed fixes will blow your freaking mind. Picture realignment, every season, based on teams choosing the division they want to be in. More »

Dykstra Strikes Out With The Help, Gets Sued [Mlb]

Barry Petchesky — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:30:00 EST

His financial empire in ruins, can we begrudge Lenny Dykstra his desire for a blow job? Yes we can, when he wants it from his personal assistant, and it's entirely non-consensual. More »

Even The Promotional Copy For Rick Reilly®'s New Book Is Phoned-In [Media Meltdowns]

Tommy Craggs — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:00:11 EST

"His new book — out May 4, 2010 — is called 'Sports From Hell, My Two-year Search for the World's Dumbest Competition'. It's the account of his three-year search for the dumbest sport in the world." [ESPN, h/t Jordan] More »

Donavon Mcnabb Traded To San Fransisco; Donovan McNabb Still On Eagles [Duan!]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 19:25:57 EST

The pic above is from this website, which posted the phony McNabb trade rumor and has confused plenty of people, including poor Michael Smith, who was credited with breaking the phantom story this morning. More »

Kige Ramsey's Star Is Larger Than Most Natural Cave Systems In Kentucky [YouTubeSportsCelebrities ]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 17:55:43 EST

The "YouTube Sports" reporter's career is flowering. First, listen to him annihilate a Tennessee fan during a hillbilly debate on 104.5TheZone's "3 Hour Lunch" by boasting about Kentucky's "natural cave systems". Also, The Jimmy Fallon Show fellates him. More »

Fortunately, Drowning Is Only A Double Minor [Zamboners]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 17:05:45 EST

Remember, Zamboni is a brand name for one specific ice resurfacing machine maker. For example, this one changes solid surfaces into liquid but it could've been manufactured by several different companies that will no longer honor the warranty. [DenverPost] More »

Beckham Prepares For A Tearful Reunion… With The Bench? []

The Spoiler — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 16:50:12 EST

"David! David! Daaaaviiiiiid!" More »

Detroit Lion Meets Real Lions To Raise Lion Awareness, Taunt Lions With Lions Helmet [Nfl]

David Matthews — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 16:15:30 EST

Today in animal news, Detroit Lions linebacker Zack Follet went to California's Cat Haven to visit with some real lions and create a video that will make you feel very, very stoned. More »

You, Dim PR Person, Are Dumb And Should Be Fired From Your Job, Part III [Prdummies]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 15:45:29 EST

PR people are stupid. Not all of them, just some of them. Like this person, who sent this pitch about "Oral Sex and Oral Cancer Linked" to a popular sports radio show's producer. Because they are dumb. More »

ESPN.com Helps Launch False "Obama Wants To Ban Fishing" Rumor [Media Meltdowns]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 14:35:05 EST

Conservative websites are up in arms this week over the Obama administration's new plan to outlaw recreational fishing in America. It's an egregious abuse of executive power, slightly mitigated by the fact that it's not remotely close to being true. More »

South Africa Receives 42 Million Condoms For World Cup Orgy [World Cup]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 13:40:41 EST

Bracing for the influx of prostitutes and ESPN staffers this summer, Britain is doing its part to help prevent the spread of HIV in South Africa, which currently has 5.7 million people infected with the virus. [NYDN] More »

Report: NFL Draft Prospect Once Put His Tremendous Upside In His Sister [Nfl]

David Matthews — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 13:15:20 EST

Tony Washington, an o-line prospect from Division II Abilene Christian, impressed at the NFL Combine. However, like many prospects before him, a crime committed in his teen years might derail him, only this one involves having sex with his sister. More »

Senate Candidate Only Supports Government Takeover Of Hockey Logos [Nhl]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 12:45:04 EST

Oregon Senate candidate Marc Delphine loves America so much that his web team co-opted the Columbus Blue Jackets logo and made it their own. Maybe Columbus can let us borrow their employee health plan too. [Thanks, Matt C.] More »

Corey Haim, Dead; Bill Simmons Mourns [Sad? Whimsy?]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 12:10:27 EST

Excpect 5,000 words on how Haim's death is comparable to River Phoenix's by 5 p.m. [SportsGuy33] More »

Washington Nationals: Go Natinals! [2010MLBPreviews]

Will Leitch — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 12:00:50 EST

Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: Washington Nationals. More »

Black Hispanic Ballplayers Aren't Black Enough For Torii Hunter [Mlb]

Tommy Craggs — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 11:40:19 EST

"They're not us," Torii Hunter tells USA Today. "They're impostors." Yeah, he's going there. More »

In Case You Wanted Updates On Howard Stern's Tiger Woods Beauty Pageant... [Tiger Woods]

DAULERIO — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 11:25:37 EST

And...good morning!: 8:49 AM (2 hours ago) From Nick Denton to tips: jopiazza (@jopiazza) 3/10/10 8:31 Tigers mistress Jamie Jungers says she and Tiger had rough sex and...he is quite well endowed...oh and no condom! Sent with Tweetie More »

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: Pittsburgh Needs A Leader [NFL Draft]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 10:20:01 EST

As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: The Steelers try to solve their current quarterback's character issues. More »

Last Night's Winner: Derek Anderson [Last Night's Winner]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 09:30:50 EST

In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Browns occasionally starting quarterback who was finally released from his own personal Purgatory—even if Purgatory isn't exactly sad to see him go. More »

What's Black And White And Read All Over? [Wake Up Deadspin]

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 08:30:41 EST

Dallas Luminaries Join Forces To Raise Awareness Of Super Bowl XLV [Dallas]

David Matthews — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 01:00:00 EST

The Dallas-Fort Worth Fox affiliate brought a group of notable Dallas sports and news figures together to promote the upcoming Super Bowl (only 334 days!). Can you name them all? More »